Say, did you ever?

What a swell party this is.


I have contrasted a bulkier figure with a relatively dainty pose. Such a thing has NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE!!! I yam so smirt.






These three drawings are from a story idea I have about Insanity, the Occult and Saturday morning cartoons. Chaos Star and Character of Aratron sold separately.


I'd never drawn Solomon Grundy before. Turns out, it's basically the Hulk with a different color scheme and slightly less rage. Try to ignore the hand and foot things happening.


Pow-pow-power Girl Power Makes it Go! Never drew her before, either. Tried to make her a bit more hero-y and bit less prostitute-y than we normally seem to see her these days.


Wizards are the Pimps of the fantasy genre. I think this is why we nerds like it so much; in that world, the guys who study the most get to be the Baddest in the Realm. Of course, even in that world, the barbarians always show up and give us noogies. We can't win.


In retrospect, should have spent more time on the actual drawing, less on the robe pattern.


The caption is a bit illegible, it says "When Gropmar is happy, he shimmers." Yeah, I don't know.


Sometimes it's fun to just start drawing shapes and see what happens to them. Granted, this thing would probably collapse under it's own weight, but so might you some day. Don't judge.


If I did some research on modern clothing and hairstyles, I would be able to draw stuff that didn't look like the Jetsons. On the other hand, I also believe that modern clothing and hairstyles should by all rights look a lot MORE like the Jetsons. Who will budge first, hmmm?


BAM!


This isn't a particularly good drawing, and there are only five people other than me who would know what it's a drawing of. Enjoy!


A caricature. Don't bother trying to figure out who it is, I've already forgotten.


Blind Dead McJones. He got da blues so bad, he don't even have guitar strings.


Make a hawk a dove! Stop a war with love! Make a liar tell the trooooth! Tried Frank Miller's nose piece thing, then regretted it.

What a Swell-egant, elegant Paaarty, this IIIIIS!

Eventually I'll Scan Some More Stuff In

...but until then, I'll just post this thing. I've already posted it elsewhere on the webber-net, and normally I try to avoid double parking, but my ennui is starting to catch up with my paranoia, with the predictable result of me failing to contribute a rodent's hind-quarters.

Glorious Insights into the Human Condition

The following scraps and sketches were made on my own free time, and NOT during some of the many hours I've spent sitting on the phone at my new job, on hold. It's very difficult to draw with a handset jammed up into your neck anyway, and I would recommend against it if I had ever done such a thing, which I have NOT. They are in no particular order.


I've read that in ancient times, warriors would often battle in the altogether. I imagine such a practice would make shield placement fairly vital.


My wee daughter. This is the face she makes when she's trying to wheedle some potato chips or extra minutes past bedtime.


I've recently started playing D and D, and found that I enjoy it quite a bit. I'm aware that only people who play D and D are interested in hearing about D and D, but I thought it was worth pointing out that an "Owl bear" is a pretty darn funny idea for a monster. I've been trying to figure out what noise it would make, and the best I've come up with is saying "whoo" in a growly Doctor Claw style voice. Try it, it's fun.


Another D and D inspired drawing. To avoid lengthy explanation, I'll merely say that in-party drama can sometimes end up with nosebleeds.


They do this. They make you sit and sit, and without warning, they hang up. Then Hulk smash.


I wanted to come up with a love interest/foil for Bee-bar. This is a very ruff Blue Betty. When I come up with a name that's less derivative, you'll be the first to know.


He's got a 1D8 mace! HAR! Did I mention I've been playing D and D?


More fat means more jolly. I hope everyone had a great holiday.

Midnight Monkey

Really, it does make sense.

Bee-Bar, Page One, Turkey

In which our hero recites his verse for an unappreciative audience.

Druid vs Lizard-man

The scene illustrated below has been painstakingly reconstructed utilizing the best, most up to date scientific research available concerning Druid/Lizard-man conflicts.

Super Industrial Blues

I can't be sure, but I don't think people often go to the internet to read poetry. I know I don't, and I quite like poetry. So in that spirit, I present another poem. Regular goofy drawing services will resume momentarily.

Super Industrial Blues

The plastic, the steel and
The strofoam shell
The aluminum foil
The styling gel
The cathode ray tube
That brand new car smell

Cracking scabs cover
The skin on my mind
Didn't even notice
I was already blind
Didn't even notice
What I'd left behind

And it eat me alive
It eat me alive
Gonna eat me alive
Oh, no

The newsman, spokesman
Man-on-the-street
Voices on the tee-vee
So soft and so sweet
I'm closest to the people
I'll never meet

We can talk all day
But ain't nothin' new
I shouldn't be here
But neither should you
Ship's full of stow-aways
There ain't no crew

And it eat me alive
It eat me alive
Gonna eat me alive
Oh, no

The stupid ones actually take longer.

Haven't dropped a poem on here in a while, ya lucky buggers.

Tamquam parvuli

We walk, and prod at things
That catch our attention
Destroying, rescuing
On a whim, on a chance
On how we feel we were treated that morning
We will invent our reasons
This afternoon

Tamquam parvuli

We laugh, and find joy
In things they won't understand
Nor will we understand theirs
And what do they know
Anyway?
Dancing in a spinning circle
Feeling the cold sky on our faces
Shouting our delight heavenwards

Tamquam parvuli

We claim whatever we can pick up
Unearned, undeserved
Dropping things
Our arms are too full
This is mine, I found it, I was here First
Not Fair, not Nice, I will run home
And tell
And we fight

Tamquam parvuli


If you got through that, here's a bonus one, with a slightly different tone.

(Sung to the tune of "California Girls". The David Lee Roth version.)

Well, Halfling girls are cute,
You know they stand the perfect height,
Eladrin chicks are the best of two worlds,
And they work it when you dim the lights,

Those Dwarvish girls are burly,
And they're always in the mood,
Dragon Born girls are pretty cool, I guess,
But it's tough to tell 'em from the dudes,

Well I've seen a hundred campaigns,
Met a thousand En-Pee-Sees,
But horns and a tail and fiery eyes,
will always knock me to my knees,

I wish they all could be Tiefling Warlock
I wish they all could be Tiefling Warlock
I wish they all could be Tiefling Warlock
Giiiirrrrlllls

Well, now that I've re-established myself as both arrogant and a nerd (not that the two are mutually exclusive, no sir), I bid you good day.

I'm not the man they think I am at home.

Oh no.
No, no.
I'm a Rocket Man.

Fall's Coming

Sometimes stuff will end up looking like other stuff, even though when you started the stuff it looked like other stuff that was different from the stuff you ended up with.

It's getting dark earlier, these days.