Toy Practice

I've read drawing your toys can be good practice. I did a pretty miserable job here, this is one of my favorite Popeye toys.

Rimshot!

In the year Twenty-eleven

2011 is off to a weird start. I have a job that may or may not last another month, I've been crazy sick, it's hard to recuperate because my new hobby is shoveling all the snow the evil sky god keeps dumping on us (and floods before that), and a nice lady from the government called the other day and told me I owe them 2 grand.

On the bright side, tho, Cindy gave me this awesome Velvet Elvis for Christmas:



Yessir, the King takes away the pain.

But with all this, I haven't really been drawing much, which puts me on edge like nothing else does. Whatever, here's some stuff that was lying around.



Never got around to posting this Ugly Baby strip with the other ones. Probably because it's kinda dumb. I mean, any idiot can tell that's not Magic Missile he's casting.





La la la happy bunny la la





Hamstoro demands cardboard tubes to run in! Caaaardboooaaard Tuuuuubes!


At least they eventually took my old fridge away. After the plow buried it 3 times.

Old School Comics

I miss those old school comics wherein just about anybody with a costume could become a hero. This was especially true of DC; for example, the original Red Tornado was a lady with a sauce pan on her head. Thus: Ajax is a guy who's a fan of the Iliad and happens to have some armor lying around. That's it. Instant superhero.

Marvel had some good stuff, too. They liked to take two seemingly disparate ideas and fuse them into wonderful nonsense, like a metallic alien who rides a cosmic surfboard. And so: a Voidac is an interstellar nosferatu that assumes the form of a cloud of cosmic dust until a ship blunders through it. The voidac then causes damage to the outside of the ship, prompting someone come out to fix the problem. Then it's lunch time.

Also like old comics, These drawings are plainly labeled for the reader's convenience. They just don't make 'em like that anymore, folks.

There's a Reason For This

Just don't ask what it is.

Zahd

Not Zod. But you can say "Kneel before Zahd!" if you want to.

And people wonder why I don't look rested.

I had some messed up dreams last night. Hand-to-hand combat on a bridge. Mutant Disney characters in the jungle. Watching soft-core pornography in the company of Betty White.

But all through these dreams, there was this tiger that would show up and start killing people. We would all scatter, I'd move on to the next dream, and then the damn tiger would show up again.

That is, until I arrived in a dream where it was announced on the radio that the Tiger Problem was so bad that a State of Emergency had been declared, and various resources had been called forth to deal with it. Foremost among these was a monkey.

"Is it Monkey-With-A-Big-Gun?", I asked, hardly daring to hope.

They nodded solemnly."Yes, it is."

At which point I leaned in to the mic and said very earnestly, "I just want to say that I'm a fan of Monkey-With-A-Big-Gun. I believe in him. I think he can do this."
Then my alarm went off, and I woke up.

Alright psychoanalysts. Get to work on THAT one.

Holee Crap, What's That?!

It's the end of the month! And it's COMING RIGHT FOR US!!

FLEEEEEEEEE!!!!

The pages crackled as they were turned.

When Time's thin walls are overthrown
And seeds of death and madness sown
When all's unmade and backward hurled
When glimpsed as One, the Triple World
Then Truth shakes to it's very core
And What was Sundered, whole once more

-Excerpt from The Cipher of Phulthan the Inscrutable

Is it true...

That people don't like white letters on black background? I read that recently. Who knew? All this time, I've been causing people undue eyestrain and disgust. Kinda makes me like a super villain.

Until now. I've reformed. Now, I'm perfectly sane and trustworthy.

Sane.

Trustworthy.

Scanner's Working Again

...but I haven't found the time to scan more stuff in and it's almost the end of the month and I wanna change the design of the blog anyway but I haven't found the time for that either and the cat is leaking and the house has run away.

So here's some stuff that was already on my hard drive for almost a year. I never intended to post them, and they're sketchy-smudgerific.



The dancers want more money. I guess. She's clearly pissed about SOMETHING.



You ever like something, but you don't want to like it? You like it, but kind of against your better judgment? It's sort of a thing where you don't see yourself as the kind of person who would like that kind of stuff?

Not me. I only like awesome things.



So this one time I go into this gaming store, because I want to buy some dice. And I'm kind of wandering around a bit, because I've never been in there before, so the clerk sidles up to me and starts trying to make some sales. He shows me where the dice is, and he asks DND style questions like "What kind of character do you play?" To which I reply "Tiefling Warlock," 'cause that is, indeed, what I play. So he shows me where all the minis and books are too, and buggers off. All the books and minis are, of course, hilariously expensive, so I instead go to the comics. I select a "Hellboy" trade paperback, and saunter over to the counter to pay. As I'm paying, the clerk gives me this kind of odd little look and says "Hellboy fan, huh?" and I say "Yeah, Mignola's great," or something along those lines, and make my exit. On the way back to the car, I realize: That guy thinks I have some kind of crazy devil fetish.

I don't. But this picture does nothing to help my case, however unlikely the pose may be.



Here, at the end, you've no doubt noticed that if I hadn't written all that extra nonsense, I probably could have used the time to scan something. You really should have mentioned it sooner. We could have avoided all this.